Hoarder

from Thanks, Courtney by Indoor Kid

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lyrics

Taking space is hard enough on its own
I make it hard on myself keeping all the shit around
In bags and boxes that I drag house to house
I can’t remember sleeping in a bed on my own

Call me a hoarder
Call me something way worse
I won’t deny it

Souvenirs from places and a life I can’t go back to
Promises we promised we’d try to keep
I can’t hold onto

Two hand painted wooden cats from the black market
Homemade sweater on a hanger in my closet
Boston airport beanie baby
And a copy of the Diners Drive Ins and Dives cookbook by Guy Fieri

There’s an envelope that lives in the bottom of a backpack with a couple dozen photographs
We’re smiling in them but now that makes me sad
I guess I’m hoping someday we could look back on em and laugh

Call me a hoarder
Call me something way worse
I wish you’d call me a little sweet potato again
Pet names and memories fade but not fast enough
And pieces linger behind
Out of sight almost out of mind

But all my friends still hang your art on their walls
So I mute our mutuals on Instagram crawls
It’s not that bad seeing you on the street when you’re all by yourself
When I’m all by myself sitting at home

I’m surrounded by you
I’m surrounded

It’s not like me to believe in anything
I can’t get my head around the thought someday I’ll find the strength to throw it all away
And even if I could
Would it matter much
Weight against the weight
I carry you inside
The ways I am
The things I do

With my fingertip I tap the tab on top of every can of beer I crack
Like the way you taught me to stop
the pressure building up

credits

from Thanks, Courtney, released November 10, 2022

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Indoor Kid Nova Scotia

transatlantic tweemo

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